I’ve been chatting with a lot of ladies and coaching a lot of clients who are in the direct sales world, and there is one thing I keep hearing.
I keep hearing, “I am afraid of people saying no.”
When I was a direct sales leader, if I heard something twice, pretty close together, it meant that it was a need or question from my team that needed to be tackled. So, that is what we are going to do today – we are going to tackle the fear of hearing no and how it is impacting your business, as well as how to change your mindset to overcome that fear.
At the end of the day, you’re in direct sales. You are a salesperson. Do you know what that means? You’re going to hear no, and that is totally okay!! You just must change the way you think about that no response.
Think about it this way, when the waitress asks if you want to see the dessert menu and you say no – is it a big deal? Absolutely not! What you’re asking is no different, and you need to learn to embrace the no and let it roll off your back so you can move on.
When growing your business, it’s important to always be asking for what you want, even if you foster a fear of no, because in reality, if you never ask the question, the answer will always be no. Right? Bet you’ve never thought about it that way!
We all have fears that hold us back but overcoming them will make us stronger as individuals and will help our business grow. When I was in direct sales, I tried to keep in mind the following four nuggets of guidance to overcome my fear of no… let’s dive in.
Want a proven plan for growing your direct sales business without feeling like you're chasing your tail? The Direct Sellers Business Blueprint explains the 4 key areas you must master to build a simplified, systematic business. It will even tell you which area to tackle first, so you can stop feeling overwhelmed or confused about what to do next. The best part? It's completely FREE!
UNDERSTAND THE VALUE OF WHAT YOU OFFER
When we understand the value of what we’re offering – the value of our business, product, and service – it’s easier to accept a no. When you ask someone to host a party or join your team, and they say no, but you understand their offer’s value, it’s easier to accept and sometimes influence a change in response.
For example, when I asked someone to host a party, I was fully aware of what HUGE value that party could bring a hostess. You know why? I did the math, ladies, and y’all know numbers don’t lie! I took a look at my commission versus what the average host saved in the product from each party. Nine times out of ten, the hostess earned more free products than I made in commission. That is a massive value! So even when someone said no, I realized it as their loss and moved on to the next, continuing to share that value.
So, what is your value? What is the value of your party experience, your mentorship, your customer page content – look at what you’re sharing and understand the value it provides to others. If you don’t have a firm understanding of this, taking a no is a little more difficult.
IS YOUR HEART IN IT?
This is huge, ladies. If your heart is not in the right place, your asks and offers will never seem genuine. Whenever you offer a host opportunity or a chance to join your team, it’ll come off as spammy, a little desperate, because it won’t be genuine, it won’t contain that real, raw excitement. It’ll be like that icky used car salesman, and that is not the type of sales we’re looking to pursue, right?
As direct sellers, you often need to check your heart to make sure you’re coming from a service mindset – it changes how we interact with people.
If someone says no, and your heart is in the right place, and you understand your value, it’s easier to redirect the conversation. You can say, “I totally understand, no worries at all, but I’d love to have you join my customer group to hang out with a bunch of other awesome ladies.”
Once they’re in your customer group, they have the opportunity to get to know you a little better and build that genuine relationship while also learning about the value of what you have to offer. Then, they’re hooked!
So when you hear a no, but your heart is in the right place of service, think about how your product or business could serve them and provide a solution that could help change their lives – that’s when the magic starts to happen. A no is not the end of the road, come at your response with your heart in the right place and a service mindset, and you’ll see success.
THE NO IS NOT PERSONAL
This may be the most important reason why many of us fear no. We all tend to look at our success as directly related to who says yes or no to us, seeing it as a failure or personal attack if someone says no to what we’re offering or asking of them.
But if you’re providing value, service, and caring for people in your business – it is not about you. It could be they’ve got a wedding, funeral, and a baby shower in one week and they can’t process doing one more thing. It could be that they’re worried about getting enough friends to get involved in a party. It’s nothing to do with you!
Let’s say you’re at a restaurant and your waitress asks you if you’d like some ketchup or a refill on your soda. If you say no to the ketchup or the extra soda, is your waitress going to take that as a personal attack? Absolutely not. And neither should you in your direct sales business.
When someone says no, simply offer them the opportunity to join your customer group or provide your contact details so you can share some free juicy tips and keep them in the loop.
Keep lovin’ on them and providing value, and maybe someday there will come a time where they’re ready to dive in and say yes to hosting, or they’ll have a need for that product. If now isn’t that time, that’s okay, and it’s definitely not personal!
DON’T LET FEAR PARALYSIS WIN
There are so many situations in life where we let our fear take the driver’s seat, and that fear of no just won’t serve you.
The question I like to ask is, “Are you more afraid of the no than you are of an empty calendar?”. When I was in direct sales and sat down to look at my calendar for the next 30 days – I was more afraid of white space than chasing asks to generate business. I was more fearful of running out of business than I was of hearing no – and that’s where I found my success.
During COVID-19, many of us let the fear that people would say no or be offended by us even asking or working during a tough time stopping our growth. But, if you lead with value and service, no one will be offended. Be confident in the value you’re providing. Come at it with a heart of service, and you will be just fine.
Done is better than perfect, I like to say, so even if the asks aren’t perfect, don’t let the fear of asking stop you altogether! That’s no way to grow.
PERFECTING THE ASK
One way to combat a no is to perfect your ask. In addition to considering the above tips, you can read our blog on Improve Your Ask & Get a Yes. With these resources, you’ll be unstoppable soon. So go get it, girl, say goodbye to the fear and negative mindsets, and chase those big goals.
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Want a proven plan for growing your direct sales business without feeling like you're chasing your tail? The Direct Sellers Business Blueprint explains the 4 key areas you must master to build a simplified, systematic business. It will even tell you which area to tackle first, so you can stop feeling overwhelmed or confused about what to do next. The best part? It's completely FREE!
Mary Haynes is a highly successful direct sales leader turned strategist and coach. Her passion is helping party plan people streamline and scale their businesses using simple, proven strategies. Her goal is to eliminate business overwhelm so direct sellers know exactly what to do and when to do it. Mary is also a homeschooling mama that lives in sunny Florida with her husband, 4 kiddos, 2 dogs, and various other backyard animals.
